Another thought on explaining why God only asks men to preach to men

A while back I wrote my response to someone who wants to submit to the bible’s teaching on men only teaching men. It used the metaphor of men protecting women in the event of a machine-gun attack. I thought of another illustration… why I prefer to drive our family car.

There are probably heaps of reasons guys like being the driver while their family is in the car; they’re arrogant, they think they know the way, they’d get scared if others drove them, I don’t know. But here’s my reason… I don’t want my wife to have to deal with guilt and the potential responsibility of killing someone… if I could bear that instead.

See, if something terrible happens… say one of our kids dies in an accident – a real accident – no one’s fault. Whoever was driving that day would have to live with the burden of being behind the wheel while their child died. That would be a horrible burden to carry (and I do hope I’m not offending anyone who’s been in this scenario).

See, getting in the drivers seat is making a decision to bear the responsibility/guilt/pressure for whatever happens from then on. You are holding the life of your passengers in your hand.

That’s why I prefer to drive. It’s not that I’m a better driver than my wife (I’m not sure I am). But if someone’s going to live the rest of their life with the burden of guilt and remorse, I’d rather it be me than her. Even the day we reversed over our cat… I’m so glad I was driving and not my wife. It would have happened exactly the same way… none of us could know the cat wouldn’t move like it did every other time. She would be even more distraught than she was if she was the one behind the wheel.

So, the same is true when you walk up to the podium to teach the bible. You’re taking on the decision to bear the responsibility for the souls of the people in the room. That’s a big responsibility. That’s a responsibility that God’ doesn’t want women to take on for men.

That’s what’s behind 1Cor3:12-17

If anyone builds on that foundation with gold, silver, costly stones, wood, hay, or straw, each one’s work will become obvious, for the day will disclose it, because it will be revealed by fire; the fire will test the quality of each one’s work. If anyone’s work that he has built survives, he will receive a reward. If anyone’s work is burned up, it will be lost, but he will be saved; yet it will be like an escape through fire. Don’t you yourselves know that you are God’s sanctuary and that the Spirit of God lives in you? If anyone destroys God’s sanctuary, God will destroy him;

Not having someone’s gift does not mean ungodliness or immaturity

We must be careful that we do not judge ourselves or others by their lack of certain ministry gifts.
Unfortunately, this seems to happen a lot. A godly person sees someone else’s gifts; leadership, preaching, music, prayer, welcoming, stewardship, whatever. They see the value if those gifts and they hear people talk up those who have them. Then they start to feel ashamed or guilty or unworthy or useless because they don’t have those gifts.
But if gifts are just that; gifts given by God according to his pleasure and grace, you can’t be proud of your own, nor feel judged by others possession of them. It has nothing to do with you.
Similarly, if you’re a leader, be careful not to suggest that because someone doesn’t have a certain gift they are somehow less mature or less godly. Gifts are gifts. Yes, God might seem to give many if your most godly people the gifts needed to be a growth group leader. But they aren’t casually connected. Gifts are gifts. Some very godly people don’t have those gifts. Some very ungodly people do have those gifts.
Thank God for godly people and thank God for gifted people.

Don’t feel guilty for making a choice – especially if you could never know which option is better

Some people seem to hate making ministry decisions… And not just big decisions, just little decisions about ministry things.
Where should I do walk up today? Who should I approach? Should I sit at this table and chat to them, or that table and chat to them?
Most of the time, there’s no right or wrong in these decisions (there could be some different mixed motivations going on, but besides that). They’re just options. Options that are mutually exclusive. You can’t do both… There’s only one of you, and we can’t reverse time (yet).
So just choose one!!!
Stop feeling guilty about what might happen if you choose one and you find out later that the other one would have been better!
1. Can you find out which one will be better now? Yes? Find out and make a decision.
2. No? Then you can’t be held responsible for your decision. Think about that in the light of God’s sovereignty and grace. God knows you don’t know which will be better. He’s not going to hold it over your head for choosing one over the other. And anyway, he knows which one you’re going to choose ANYWAY!!
So stop fretting and feeling guilty about something you can’t be judged for. In fact, stop wasting time being self-absorbed about “your decision”. Get over yourself and choose.