Ignore anonymous feedback

Feedback is good. Even when its critical, hard to hear, ill-informed, or just wrong.

But feedback is bad when its anonymous because feedback – no matter how critical it may be – is relational. Its my opinion about you, but “voiced”. I’m not keeping it to myself, (and I’m not telling others ‘cause that’s “gossip”) but instead I’m making my opinion known to you.

But what happens when I tell you my opinion, but I don’t tell you it came from me?

All of a sudden you know what “someone” thinks, but you don’t know who that “someone” is. You could be speaking to them now, or tomorrow, or never even speak to them again. It could even be your best friend. You can’t know.

You can see how giving you feedback, without letting you know who I am, is ultimately very unloving, selfish and cowardly. Its a way of telling you what I think, without any consequences to myself.

So, if you get anonymous feedback, the only way to stop the effects of the selfishness that started it, is to just not read it.

If there’s no name on it, stop reading and throw it.

Does your opinion matter?

20130607-234229.jpgSome people are far too liberal with their own opinions – they’ll throw it in anywhere they can, whether they know anything about the situation or not. They’re usually the type of people who end up writing blogs.

Other people don’t give their own opinions enough credit. They really do have good ideas, good perspectives, good insights that they should share.

I think should is the right word there. Not can, or may, but should.

If your opinion really matters, if its not just some attempt to blow your own trumpet, if its actually springing from a desire to help and love and grow people… then share it! Let others in on it because it matters.