questions
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Repost: When a question turns into a ransom note
A ransom note isn’t a question. It might use words like “please” or “I was wondering if…”, but in the end it means, “if you don’t do this, I’m going to hold it against you / hold it over your… Continue reading
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Heisenberg’s Church
How’s your church going? How would you test it? What measurement would you use? Who would you ask? What about the individuals? How’s that person going; with godliness, prayerfulness, living out of grace not law, being generous? But, what happens as… Continue reading
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Reblog – Let people finish your…
sentences. Whether you’re leading a growth group, preaching a sermon or just a one on one… don’t just say everything and rely on people’s hearing and memory. If they are listening to you, they’ll be able to finish your sentence.… Continue reading
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Why you need to squeeze the pus in difficult conversations
When it’s clear someone has a concern, the longer it takes to get the concern out of them, the more likely there is that there’s other concerns still sitting behind that one. Once you’ve started digging, and they’re opening up… Continue reading
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What are they afraid of?
If you can help Christians answer this question for themselves, for their own lives and their own ministry involvement, you help them take a big step towards maturity as they face fear with the god who provides and promises to… Continue reading
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Why you should answer questions with statements and statements with questions
Whether you’re in a small group or answering questions from out the front, this is a good rule of thumb. If someone asks a question, and assuming its a genuine question, you don’t want to beat around the bush or… Continue reading
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Validate people’s questions before you answer
Sometimes, the best apologetic is just to make your opponent believe you understand their issue. Validate their question, spend time convincing them you really do understand their question. If you don’t do this, they won’t believe you’ve thought about your… Continue reading
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You have a culture, did you know?
Whatever the group, big or small, whole church or growth group, it has a culture. There’s a commonly agreed way things are. A commonly held idea about how things happen; evangelism, bible reading, singing, everything. You only notice it when… Continue reading
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Address people’s emotions before you address their questions
If someone asks you a difficult question, or a personal question, or an emotionally charged question, chances are they’re not going to be listening to what you say. Instead, all that’s going to be going through their mind is… How… Continue reading
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Do you help people say no?
As a general rule, people who end up in Full-time paid ministry are they type of people who can either say “yes” to everything (and get it done), or they’re the type of people who feel comfortable saying “no” to… Continue reading
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Turn feelings into numbers
Not every time, but sometimes, its really helpful to ask people to translate their feelings into numbers… just a simple scale of 1-10. It’s great because it avoids too-positive and too-negative assumptions. When someone says, “Yeah, I’m ok” what do… Continue reading
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Questions don’t have to be answered
“Jesus said to them, ‘Neither will I tell you by what authority I do these things’” Matt 21:27 We have a very peculiar cultural rule; that if someone asks you a question, you have to answer that question. We seem… Continue reading
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“don’t tell me if you don’t want to”
If you’re in pastoral ministry; teaching the bible, meeting up with people, etc., you start to loom large in people’s eyes. And that’s not bad per se. It’s partly how God has made humans. But it requires some important caveats.… Continue reading
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Answer questions from your grid
Most questions get asked because of wrong assumptions. They’re still good questions. They’re not stupid questions. But people ask them because what you’re telling them doesn’t fit with their existing believes, and they assume you’re wrong. So that’s why the… Continue reading
MINISTRY PRINCIPLES & PRAGMATICS 